154 Days of Joshua

154 days since my life changed forever. 

154 days since my last good night of sleep. 

154 days since my heart melted and I understood what real love is.

154 days since Joshua came into our lives ... 154 wonderful days it has been. 

Motherhood is quite the journey. I'm exhausted, yet exhilarated. Challenged, yet overjoyed. Frustrated, yet forever grateful. 

God sure knew what He was doing. For every spit up, there's 15 smiles. For every poopy blow out, there's 10 minutes of giggles and glee. For every tear, there's warm, contented sighs of love. For every moment of "Why the heck is he acting like this?!", there's dozens of silly faces, new discoveries and funny noises. 

This is the most refining process I've ever been through. The independence of adolescence was one thing. The self discovery of college was another. The selfless reform of marriage was a doozy .... but nothing, I repeat nothing compares to the pride-breaking, selfishness-shedding, plan-deterring journey of motherhood. 

154 days of Joshua has been 154 days of intense molding of Mommy. And I'm guessing there's lots 'n' lots more to come. 

Good thing God blessed me with an adorable son who lights up my life! He makes this all worthwhile.

Vacation with a Four Month Old

If you know us, you know we can be a little crazy. 

So you won't be surprised when I tell you that we just took a vacation with Joshua to Breckenridge, CO. 

Yes, yes--we are crazy. 

But to be completely honest, when I stop being overly dramatic and negative and look intstead at the positive, we had a wonderful time. 

Did I get a break from nursing? No. 

Did I vacation from nap schedules? No. 

Did I receive rest instead of sleepless nights? No. Not even close. 

But did I lounge in my pajamas? Yes. 

Did I giggle in bed with Josh instead of getting up to work? Yes. 

Did I take lots of walks in near perfect weather? Yes. 

Did I soak up sunshine with my smiley baby boy? Yes. 

Did I indulge in good food and lots of popcorn? Yes. 

Did Erik and I watch an entire season of Everwood? Yes. 

Did I start and finish two novels? Yes. 

Did I kick back with good friends and a glass of wine? Yes. 

Did I sing Patti Cake and Head & Shoulders multiple times just to make Josh smile? Yes. 

Did I stay off Facebook and the Internet for the whole week? Yes. 

Did I converse with my husband over coffee and Bibles? Yes. 

Did I vacation? 

YES!

I may be just as exhausted as when I left, but boy am I glad we went. Motherhood changes everything ... for the better.