The Word

My goodness. Sometimes I get so frustrated with myself. Isn't it incredible how hypocritical we can be? Sometimes I'm just shocked at the things I hear coming out of my mouth. Things like, 

It's so important to be in the Word every day--even if it's just for a few minutes. 

It's so simple--just set aside a couple of minutes and pray! 

Talk to God as you go about your life--pray while you cook, clean, drive!

Memorize Scripture--it's so crucial to our ability to get through the day. 

But seriously, Kristin, when was the last time you really did any of this??? I've probably relied too much on the "just pray throughout your day" and neglected to set aside purposeful time with God. 

I just sat down and read Colossians. And I chose to read it straight through, and out loud. I LOVE LOVE reading the Bible out loud. First of all, it helps me focus. Second of all, it just makes the text come alive! To hear Paul's tone, and inflection, and humor, and passion ... At the end of the book, as I read Paul's final words, tears sprung in my eyes because I truly heard his voice, and felt his love and concern for the people of Colosse--and for me.

So my challenge to you is:

• Sit down. 
• Pick up your Bible. 
• Choose a book (probably a short one :])
• Read it straight through, and out loud. 
• And praise God for His Word.

Olive Garden

So, I was at Olive Garden this week.

Twice.

Two VERY different experiences ...

Monday night I was included in a "Moms' Night Out" with a group of ladies from church. We all looked our best--I actually did my eye make up and blow dried my hair--laughed a lot, talked about nursing and exercise, and poopy diapers. The bartender, who served us while we waited for our table, seemed happy to have us around.

Fast forward to Thursday evening.

I walk into Olive Garden, this time in work out clothes (though I was nice enough to change my sweats for jeans, and squirt some perfume. Hey--at least I tried.) This time, I have a 9 month old on my hip--who's still in his sleeper, mind you, from the night before--a diaper bag dangling from my shoulder, hair swept into a messy pony tail, and dried baby food crusted to my fingernails. Instead of other care free young Moms my age, this time I'm with my parents (carefree and wonderful as they are, probably not as exciting for the bartender) and my three teenaged sisters. (Too young for the bartender.)

Said bartender from Monday night catches my eye. Recognition, and slight confusion, floats across his face. I caught his eye back, smiled, and turned to focus on my son, thinking how strange it is to have these seemingly different personas.

And talk about a different evening! Instead of browsing the menu, relaxing in my chair, and sharing antics of Joshua with my friends, I rescued Blackberrys, hid knives, picked up bread, pushed away water glasses, untangled spaghetti noodles, cut up tomato, wiped messes, and never relaxed once in my seat. All while conversing with my family and attempting to feed myself.

Two very different evenings. One fabulous life.

BIG decision

Which photos should I print and hang on our dining room wall??? Vote in the poll for your fav ... I'll end up doing two.

Photo #1

Photo #2

Photo #3

Photo #4

A Peek into my Head

As I sit here at this keyboard, I feel a little stalled. I want to blog--I really do. I know it feeds my soul, and sometimes ministers to others. I'm blessed by the impact my words have had on others throughout the years, and I would hope that God would choose to continue working through me that way.

But can He?

Oops ... scratch that. WILL He? (Because, of course, I know He CAN do whatever He chooses.)

Will He work through me?

When I'm hardly in the Word?
Barely eeking out prayers?
Discontent with parts of my life?
Exhausted and overwhelmed?
When I'm selfish and stubborn?
Critical and lazy?

Will He work through me when my life is disorganized, out of sync, swirling, whirling and possibly not in line with Him?

Will He?

Hm ... this got a little more dramatic than I meant it to. Ha--story of my life!

I'm really struggling with this whole transition to motherhood. I'm realizing that I naively thought Joshua would just fit right alongside me in my current life. That adding a baby really was just like adding an accessory--he would make me look pretty, add a taking piece to my daily life, and come along with me wherever my whims took me.

SOOOO not the case.

What was I thinking?

Did I really think I could work from home, with no outside help to watch my child?
Did I really think I could continue serving with the youth ministry in the same capacity, and that Joshua would just sleep in the corner of the youth group room on Wednesdays?
Did I really think I'd still get to the gym to work on my fitness at least 2 times a week?

Did I really think the shoes could stay by the front door, the fire place could be turned on, the cat food/water could stay on the kitchen floor, the photo books could stay on the coffee table shelf, and the computer cords could continue to dangle off the dining room table?

Words like: Organize. Prioritize. Schedule. Evaluate. Time Management. How do they make you feel? They make me want to puke. Which is ironic, because Time Management was one of my favorite seminars to teach when I was an academic advisor.

I just about died when I read my sister-in-laws FB status the other day. Something about creating yearly, monthly, weekly, daily, hourly, minutely schedules. (Okay, there's that propensity for the dramatic again. I'm pretty sure she stopped at daily ...) I read her status and immediately felt sick to my stomach. "I can't do that!" was my thought. And yet, it's quite possible, that I could.

I called said sister-in-law the other day to get advice. She is mother to 3 amazing kiddos, and somehow manages to cook, keep house, teach classes at a music school, and still have coffee here and there with friends. What the ??!! I remember saying to her something to the effect of, here I am, with college degree on top of college degree...someone who trains others on how to manage time and succeed in life ... and I can't figure out how to create and stick to any sort of schedule. AH!!! And she said lots of good stuff ... too bad I'm so caught up in my drama right now to listen very well to anyone. But I do know she said something about trying and failing and trying again. And not trying to be perfect. Hm....think she knows me at all?

I think so.

Well, this "peek in my head" turned out to be more of a stream of consciousness with no real point. Other than to let you understand how confused my head is right now. Hopefully it was semi entertaining for you ... I think I'm glad I did it. Except I gave up a quick nap to do this instead ... hmmm ... Ask me at 5pm tonight when Josh is fussy and I'm alone with him for the evening and I have a headache if I'm glad I chose blogging over napping.

A Baby Changes ... Everything!

Currently, at 9:54pm, I am sitting at my dining room table and this is what I'm noticing:

Panting
Drooling
Rapid movement
Random noises
Intense focus
Bodily function noises
and a being terrorizing our cats.

Did we get a puppy? No. We have an 8 month old. Who won't stay asleep. 

He didn't agree with us at 7pm when we said bedtime. Apparently he wanted to join Mommy and Daddy at their special steak dinner.
He didn't listen when Daddy said, "Sleepytime!" at 7:30 and Mommy had to come to the rescue. He gave in for a while, but decided to put up a fight again at 9, partly due to a bad cough that woke him up. Secretly, I think he knew we were watching PSYCH without and was jealous. He smelled the popcorn, I'm sure.
And now, at 9:58pm, after two more attempts at bedtime soothing and rocking, Joshua is army crawling frantically from one end of the dining room to ...

PAUSE.


Ok, I'm back. I had to do a finger swipe and retrieve what I believe to be petrified banana chunks from his mouth. I guess I should vacuum tomorrow.

Now he's sitting on Daddy's lap, reaching for the Mac and slobbering all over the table.

A baby changes everything--evening plans, dinner plans, T.V. plans, blogging plans, cleaning plans ... and I wouldn't have it any other way.