Friday, March 6, 2009

Voice from the Past

When the bottom drops out,
Look Up.

Psalm 27, David Looked Up.

The Lord is my light and my salvation--whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life--of whom shall I be afraid?

David refused to cave into fear. Sometimes, it is a sheer force of the will to get myself to Look Up, not around, when walking through trying circumstances in life.

One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple.
Daddy's presence always calms a child in a storm; the child Looks Up. When we Look Up, stability, security and safety come.

Hear my voice when I call, O Lord; be merciful to me and answer me. My heart says of you, "See his face!" Your face, Lord, I will seek.

Look Up, and live by faith. And always be thankful.

Circumstances, good and bad, will always be around. God uses them to shape me. Will I Look Up? ... or down?

~Sermon notes, Psalm 27, July 7, 2002

These notes have, for some reason, rested between the pages of my Bible for 6 1/2 years. That is a LONG time to not lose a piece of paper! And yet, considering the words on the page, it's hardly surprising. These words speak to me more now than they did when I was just a carefree sophomore in college.

Psalm 27 is very meaningful to me. If you scanned page 589 in my Bible, you'd see many hand written colored notes in the margin--so many, in fact, that I'm almost out of room. I have arrows connecting the thoughts and dates marking the passage of time. I'd like to share with you ...

The chapter ends with these verses:
I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.
The notes begin...

Freshman Year 2001-2002
"Let to this again. God's plan is not my own--be content" 6/22/02
"And again ... sermon at church" 7/7/02
"And again ..." 9/22/02
"And again ...'Due Time!'" 6/8/04
"A job for Erik!!!" 4/4/05
"Leaving? Moving?" 7/17/06
"Miscarriage ... " 3/28/07
"Still waiting ..." 8/15/08
"I'm so tired ..." 12/20/08

I know these notes don't mean much, if anything at all, to someone reading this blog. But each date, each color of pen, each word choice reminds me of a time when I was once again led to read those words, "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord". I don't just see the words, "And again..." I hear the tone, picture the image, wrestle with the emotions all over again ...

And as I Look Back, I remember that the times where I found the most peace, are always the times when I chose to Look Up.

And that is when I am so grateful for the voice from my past--me--who reminds me to Wait for the Lord.


  1. Kristin that's so beautiful and inspiring. And the passages are very powerful. You're definitely a woman I Look Up to.

  2. i'm so emotional these much going on inside & out. Thank you for sharing these consistently revisited thoughts.