At my 14 week doctor's appointment, the doctor informed me that I might have a slight infection and that they would do a urine culture to find out. She asked me if I'd noticed any spotting. I said no. The appointment wrapped up and Erik and I left. I went to the bathroom and Ta Da!
Ugh. But it was soooo light and unsubstantial I thought well, let's just see if it gets worse. So I went about my day. The spotting continued, so I let my doctor know. She wanted me to come back in for an U/S, just to make sure everything was okay. That made me more nervous, but I still pretty much kept my calm. Which was great--an quite abnormal for me. I mean, we had heard a strong heartbeat that morning, and I wasn't really spotting so....
She prepped me for the U/S, put that nasty gel on my belly and Boom-there Bubba was. Just chillaxing in my womb, completely unaware of the slight fear and chaotic schedule going on around him. Completely and totally unaware to how his/her little life is so cherished, so hoped for, so prayed over. As soon as we got him on the screen, we saw his usual antics of kicking, twisting and turning. I realized he was totally upside down--and loving it! Bubba's just in there, having a ball, bouncing around with room to spare, while I'm concerned about whether he/she's alive or not. It's just crazy.
Like right now, it has been a week or so since that U/S, so I'm reaching the point of "What if" that I come to between every doctor's appointment. What if something has happened and I just don't know yet. What if the infection is affecting the baby. What if, what if...what if.
And guess what? I'm quite sure Bubba is just dancing away inside me, completely and totally unaware of anything except his love for movement, the whoosh whoosh beating of my heart, and the fact that amniotic fluid now moves through the nose and respiratory tract to help develop the lungs.
What a life Bubba has in there!